Queen and I broke up last Tuesday.
I’ve been having an extremely hard time overcoming her birthday night. It’s turned out to be really traumatizing event. And Queen has been completely resistant to grasp the severity of the situation. I told Queen that I am serious about getting married and raising a family, but I refuse to marry someone who can loose control like that. It is a potentially abusive situation, and I just refuse. There’s been two “best friends” of hers that have told me she gets like that often when she drinks “excessively”. That is really scary to me.
I explained to Queen last night that I grew up with parents that were alcoholics, and it is not something I’d want to continue in my family. My mom is currently still an alcoholic after being sober for maybe 8 years. It puts myself at risk too that it does run within my family. I told Queen that I worry for myself sometimes too, and that I try to be mindful of the amount I consume. Queen’s mother is a drug addict, so substance abuse runs in hers as well. I told Queen that ever since her birthday night I’ve been afraid for her. I said that it doesn’t matter whether or not we’re together, even if your out with friends drinking, I’m going to worry about whether or not your getting too drunk. And that’s a lot of pressure on me.
Queen told me last night that she’s going to “get me back” and “treat me right next time”. Regardless, everything is still yet to be determined. We are broken up until further notice. I plan to keep my distance from her, and I am thinking it should be at least one month’s time. But if she says she’ll come to Massachusetts than maybe I’ll reconsider. I am significantly lower the text messages I send her, and I’m just going to focus more on myself for a few weeks.